#TBT: Boob Talk

Between World Breastfeeding Week, Kim Kardashian, and my buddy Lauren from college sending me a copy of her new book, The Places You’ll Feed, breasts are all up in my business (bizness?), so I’m writing a #TBT boob post.

Ironically, on top of turquoise, grass-topped Seussian column is one of the few places I didn't breastfeed or pump.
Ironically, on top of turquoise, grass-topped Seussian column is one of the few places I didn’t breastfeed or pump.

I breastfed both my kids until they were a little over a year old, and I started working when each of them was about 3 months old. So, that’s over 18 months of pumping. Pumping, in a word, sucks. Yes, it literally sucks milk out of your boobs, but it also figuratively sucks, unless you enjoy being milked like a cow and living in fear of a coworker or stranger (not sure which is worse) witnessing you in the act. That’s why this is still one of my favorite tumblr posts of all time. While a lot of women have been shamed for publicly nursing their babies (shame on you, shamers!), I never had an issue with that. I nursed my babies under a nursing cover (mine was called the Yoko, no joke, and she in no way broke up my band) at restaurants, in parks, and at friends’ houses. [Side note: Am I the only person who doesn’t like the term “feeding” for nursing? I was a huge Buffy the Vampire Slayer fan, and they always used “feeding” to describe how vampires sucked blood. Now that I think about it, I guess that is pretty similar to how babies nurse. Regardless, I don’t like “feed”.] I did have some nursing problems (thrush, pain, hot compresses, oh god I’m having flashbacks, I guess I don’t want a third child), but what I really hated was pumping, especially when I was traveling. Oh the places I pumped included airport bathrooms, airplane bathrooms, bar bathrooms, work bathrooms, the hotel room at my best friend’s wedding, the passenger seat of the car, and one abandoned office room on a commercial set, WITH NO LOCK ON THE DOOR. That was some paranoid pumping. I’ve also had friends that struggled really badly with nursing, and were killing themselves trying to make it happen because of g-d things like World Breastfeeding Week (I’m sorry I mentioned it earlier).

What I like about Lauren’s book is that it takes the stigma off nursing. It acknowledges that it can be hard, tedious, and uncomfortable, but all with the lighthearted Seussian humor that has previously taken the edge off of controversial topics like family violence (Hop On Pop), food racism (Green Eggs & Ham), and LSD use (One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish).

If you would like a copy of The Places You’ll Feed, it’s on Amazon Smile here (Amazon Smile donates a portion of all profits to charity; my favorite is the International FOP Association.), or you can leave a comment letting me know who you know who might enjoy it, and I’ll give away my copy to one randomly chosen commenter. It makes a great baby shower gift!

4 thoughts on “#TBT: Boob Talk”

  1. Hit home… The word “feeding!” Every time I say it , I feel like I’m talking about my little vamp baby !


  2. Hit home … The word “feed!” Every time I say it, I feel like I’m talking about my little vamp baby. And then a scene from True Blood pops into my brain!


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